Konoha Academy
by 0Shadow Panther0
Summary: Haruno Sakura's life is a mess. And that, folks, is the the worlds biggest understatement in a nutshell of the century. For starters, the orphanage that she used to live at ships her off to an all boys school, Konohagakure's Konoha Academy for Boys. Then there's the problem of fan boys, fan girls after her fan boys, and all that crazy freshman crap. Killing spree, anyone?
1. Chapter 1

Konoha Academy

Ch. 1

Let's say that Haruno Sakura's life was pretty crappy right now. That's in a nutshell. And it's an understatement.

She has to deal with a freaking fan club on her first week of school. No one should have to deal with that! How did she even a fan club in the first place?

Sure she has pink hair the color of her namesake (which was _completely_ natural), sparkling emerald eyes, and a perfect, slim figure, but she wasn't a beauty queen like her best friend Ino, or kind and gentle like her good friend Hinata, or graceful or confident like Ten Ten and Temari, her other friends.

Nah, it must have been the fact that she was a girl attending to Konoha Academy for Boys, which is where Sakura's story begins…

"What? You're kidding me! Tell me this a joke!" a slim, pink-haired teen screamed at the unfortunate orphanage manager.

"Ah, well, Sakura-san, you see, this orphanage is low in funds, and all the other schools were full, a-and, well…" the manager trailed off, intimidated by the furious teenager before him.

"Well, this is a guy's school! Did you even read the name! 'Konoha Academy for Boy's'! _Boys_, damn it!" Sakura ranted.

"I'm terribly sorry, Sakura, but the bus to Konohagakure is leaving soon," the manager covered, and shoved Sakura out the door, hastily slamming it closed and locking it once the pink-haired demon was out.

Emerald eyes blazing, Sakura stormed away, leaving the orphanage and its inhabitants for what she hoped to be for the rest of her life.

One three hour bus ride and one _very_ irritated girl later, Sakura stomped towards the dorm rooms, which should have been for _boys_, where she could just throw her stuff away and punch a wall.

Poor wall. It wasn't your fault that Sakura needs to vent her frustrations out on you.

It took Sakura fifteen minutes to storm across Konoha Academy _for Boys_' campus and to the dorms.

As soon as she reached the tall, imposing buildings of the dorms, Sakura's cell phone started ringing. She check the caller ID and scowled. It now read _Idiot Manager._

"What do you want?" Sakura growled.

"Er, I forgot to tell you that…" the "Idiotic Manager" trailed off.

"Tell me what?" Sakura hissed furiously.

"You're going to, ah… SHARE ROOMS WITH SOME OF THE GUYS!" the manager shrieked fearfully and hung up. Sakura twitched, and deleted "Idiotic Manager" from her contacts. But not before sending a death threat via texting.

Sakura grudgingly trudged towards her dorm room, number C4.

Sakura groaned. "With my luck, it'll probably explode, too," she muttered under her breath.

One word. Two syllables. Five letters. Taboo.

Right on cue, the wooden door exploded, followed by a few screams of panic and an "ART IS A BANG, YEAH!"

Sakura twitched, and a vein popped. Kicking down the charred remains of the door, she took a quick glance around, she located a boy who looked to be a year older than her with a maniacal smile on his face. Said boy had long, dark blonde hair in a high pony tail and long bangs covered of his sky blue eyes. He had soot covering most of his face, and the tips of his hair were singed and blackened.

Without hesitation, she calmly walked up to the blonde and not so calmly socked him in the face with a war cry of "SHANNARO!"

The apparently insane boy was sent flying across the now destroyed room. Sakura was able to make out where the furniture might have been, but the walls, ceiling, and floor were charred and soot covered to the point where she couldn't tell what the original colors were.

"What the hell is your problem, yeah?" blonde cried, staggering out of a pile of smoking wood.

"That should be _my_ line," Sakura shot back.

"Deidara, enough," a male voice growled, annoyance evident in his tone. Sakura whipped around to be met with a young man close to her age with blood red hair and melted caramel eyes. He too was covered head to toe with ash.

"But Sasori no Danna, she punched me, yeah!" the one called Deidara whined.

"Girly looks, girly man," Sakura retorted. Deidara twitched and scowled. Apparently his long hair and slightly transitive looks were a sore subject for him.

Ignoring the glares that Deidara shot him, the red head grimaced apologetcially.

"I'm sorry about my friend's behavior," he bowed. "The idiot that I am ashamed to call my best friend is Iwa Deidara, and I am Akasuna Sasori," Sasori continued, bluntly ignoring or not caring about the protests of the soot covered blonde.

"Haruno Sakura," she introduced, sticking her hand out for a handshake. "I would like to say pleased to meet you, Sasori –san, but that would be a lie under these conditions. No offense."

"None taken," Sasori reassured her, taking the offered hand and shaking it a few times.

"No one's greeting me, yeah," Deidara muttered, crouching in a corner to grow mushrooms. Sasori and Sakura sweat dropped.

"Anyways, what are you doing here, Haruno-san? This is an all-boys school," Sasori questioned.

"Long story short, a _was_ a scholarship student, but the rest of the schools were filled up and I couldn't afford to go those private boarding schools in Suna," Sakura explained unhappily.

"So your parents sent you to a guys' school? What kind of whack jobs are they, yeah?" Deidara said in disbelief.

"They didn't," Sakura said bluntly. "The orphanage did. My parents are six feet under." With that, Sakura turned heel and left the devastated room, her face carefully blank and eyes shimmering with unshed tears.

"…Was it something I said, yeah?"

_Smack!_

Sakura stormed out of the doors, eyes tightly closed to stop the tears that threatened to fall.

She was so wrapped up in her memories that she didn't notice that she bumped into someone until she was on her butt, looking at a familiar blonde boy.

Said blonde boy had short, spiky hair, brilliant pale blue eyes, and whisker like… Scars? Tattoos? Birthmarks? Sakura couldn't tell. What did surprise her was when the boy's eyes widened.

"S-Sakura-chan? It is you! Are you alright? Why are you crying? Do want to get some ramen? That's what I do when I'm sad!" The boy rattled off things, unaware of the fact that Sakura was staring at him in shock, her mouth in a small _o._

Suddenly it clicked. Love of ramen, whiskers, _way_ too much energy…

"Naruto… kun?" she whispered. This time, she let the tears fall.

Naruto immediately embraced her, his strong arms wrapped around her back.

"Yup! It's me! Believe it!" Naruto grinned, happier than he had been in a long time. Despite the fact that Sakura was sobbing on his shoulder, he was still as happy as his perverted adopted father Jiraiya was with his porn books. Which were the ones that he _wrote._

"S-sorry, Naruto-kun. I must seem like a crybaby now, huh?" Sakura sniffed, wiping away stray tears from veridian eyes.

"No problem, Sakura-chan! I'm just glad to see you!" Naruto chirped, grinning ear to ear, looking as much as a fox as ever. Sakura let out a tentative smile before standing up fully.

"I was just reminiscing… You know, about my mom and dad," Sakura smiled softly.

"Yeah… They died in a plane crash, didn't they?" Naruto's grin softened a little bit. Suddenly perking up, Naruto asked, "What are you doing here, anyway? This is a guys school! Are you here to visit your boyfriend? Why! Sakura, why didn't you tell me you found somebody! NOOOOO!"

Ten minutes and a smack to the head later, Naruto had a vague understanding of what had happened with the "lack of funds and school overcrowding," and "No, Naruto, I do _not_ have a boyfriend, and _no_, I will _not_ go out with you if I'm free and single."

If Sakura had to repeat this one more time, this was gonna be one hell of a school year.

"Dobe, who the hell are you hugging?"

Life just got a lot worse.


	2. Chapter 2

Konoha Academy

Ch. 2

"Dobe, who the hell are you hugging?" The voice rang loud and clear, the voice of Sakura's childhood crush who she learned was really just another pompous brat with a fifty foot stick up his ass.

"Oi! Sasuke-teme! Don't you recognize Sakura-chan? You know, from the orphanage?" Naruto practically hollered, apparently disbelieving of the fact that "holier than thou" Sasuke would remember one little pink haired girl from the orphanage from more than four years ago.

"Hey, Sasuke-kun," Sakura bit out, obviously unhappy with this turn of events, although Naruto, as usual, was oblivious to her discomfort. Sasuke merely gave her a curt nod.

"Haruno-san! There you are!" a voice called.

Startled, Sakura turned around…

… and was tackled to the ground by two bodies.

"Sasori-san… Deidara-san… Please get off me," Sakura groaned.

Deidara and Sasori jumped off of Sakura's prone figure and graciously offered a hand to help her up.

However, as soon as Sakura was back on her feet, Deidara tackled her in a stifling, wind knocking hug.

"I'm so sorry, Haruno-san, yeah! I didn't mean it!" Deidara cried.

"It's okay, Deidara-san," Sakura soothed, awkwardly patting the explosive lover's back. "You didn't know."

Suddenly Naruto burst into tears.

"Why, Sakura-chan! You said you didn't have a boyfriend!" he cried.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. "This is your boyfriend?"

"No, he's not," Sakura bit out. "And even if he was, it's none of your business," she finished, shoving Deidara's body off of hers.

"So who is he?" Sasuke questioned.

Sakura grimaced. "My roommate."

Another five minutes of explaining to Sasuke why she was enrolled at an all boys school and a punch to Deidara and Naruto's faces later, Naruto, perking up, said, "Wait! If Sakura-chan is in the same room as Deidara and Sasori, that means that the teme's brother is there, too!"

"The teme's brother?" Sakura asked.

"My brother, Itachi Uchiha," Sasuke growled, Naruto bobbing his head up and down enthusiastically in confirmation.

"You mean me," a smooth, velvety voice sounded right behind Sakura, startling her.

She whirled around to see a tall teenager, around a head taller than herself, who looked _a lot_ like Sasuke, only _a lot _hotter, and more refined and elegant.

The young man had longer hair than Sasuke, jet black and tied in a low pony tail at the nape of his neck. His eyes were dark, like a combination of dark chocolate and ebony, and little bits of crimson bled through their depths. His face was handsome, with his pale skin contrasting with his dark eyes and hair, but there were stress lines between his eyes, on either side of his nose. All in all, he had a sense of calm, confidence, and soft pride, unlike the younger Uchiha, with his "holier than thou" arrogance and stick up his ass attitude.

"My name is Itachi," the man said softly, sticking out his hand. Slightly surprised by this handsome man, Sakura dumbly clasped his and almost jumped when he brought his lips to the back of her hand. "It is a pleasure to meet you."

"U-uh, p-pleased to meet you, too," Sakura stuttered, inwardly cursing, she was acting like Hinata now!

She jolted her hand back and smiled nervously. Out of the corner of her eye Sakura could see Deidara and Sasuke scowling, Sasori's face completely blank, and Naruto bawling again.

"_What the heck is wrong with the guys?_" she thought, tilting her slightly in confusion.

That's when she heard _it_.

"Deidara-sempai! Sasori-sempai! Itachi-sempai! Tobi is sorry! Tobi got lost! But Tobi is a good boy!"

Yup, Uchiha Tobi, Sasuke and Itachi's cousin twice removed on their mother's side. How someone so damned _noisy_ be related to someone like Sasuke, whose full vocabulary consisted of _hn, dobe, whatever, _and _annoying__. _She had met the annoying Uchiha briefly (Tobi, not Sasuke. Sasuke is to be referred as _the annoying Uchiha with a fifty foot long stick up his arse_), at a small party thrown at the orphanages twentieth anniversary.

The only reason why Sasuke was not living with Tobi and his uncle, twice removed on his mother's side, was simple. They were not aware of his existence, seeing as Sasuke had given everyone ten dollars if they promised not to tell them that he was even alive.

Apparently Tobi knew Sasuke was alive now.

The eye-patched young man was racing over to the small group, his disheveled hair becoming even messier as he tripped over an unknown something and face planted in the dirt, resulting in an exasperated groan from Deidara.

However, upon seeing Sakura, Tobi popped up, apparently undeterred by his earlier *_cough_epicfail_cough* _trip and fall.

"Yay! It's a pretty girl! Tobi likes the pretty girl!" Tobi screeched, immediately glomping Sakura. "What's the pretty girl's name? Doesn't the pretty girl think that Tobi is a good boy?"

"My name is Sakura, and yes you're a good boy. Now get off!" Sakura flinched, pushing the offending body away.

Looking slightly dejected, but nonetheless happy that Sakura had said he was a "good boy," Tobi went to bug Sasuke, much to Itachi and Naruto's amusement, the latter openly laughing at the youngest Uchiha's disgusted expression and the forming merely smirking at his little brother's obvious discomfort.

"So…" Sakura began, hoping to start a conversation. "Is there anyone else staying at our dorm?"

Sasori nodded. "So far, its me, you, Deidara, Itachi, Itachi's friend Hoshigaki Kisame, some freshman named Sabaku no Gaara, and a sophomore named Hyuga Neji."

Sakura gasped at the last two names.

"I know those guys!" she said excitedly. "Gaara's Temari's younger brother and Neji's Hinata's cousin!"

"Huh. Really? That's a new one, yeah. But then again, they never really talked about their family," Deidara yawned, rubbing the back of his neck.

Sakura stared at him quizically.

"How the _hell_ can you be tired after blowing up a _whole freaking room_?" Sakura questioned, cocking up one eyebrow.

"Dunno, yeah. Never really thought about it. Probably because I've blown up more things than I can count, yeah," Deidara pondered. "Anyways, art is a bang, and art takes energy, so.." The blonde bombist trailed off, thinking about what he just said.

"Brat," Sasori snorted. "Art is everlasting, eternal. Art should be around forever, so that all can admire it and bask in its greatness." This seemed to send Deidara into a twitching spasm.

"No way, yeah! Art is fleeting, engraved into your memory, and it leaves you wishing for more, but you'll never get it! That's what makes you want it, yeah!" Deidara argued, shaking furiously.

Sasori only responded with a small, "Hmph," and turned away, sending his friend into another flurry of twitches. The two artists then began a heated argument about "true art" and whether it should be a BANG or everlasting and eternal.

Not wanting to get dragged into the furious argument, Sakura inched closer to Itachi and whispered, "Are they_ always_ like this."

Itachi sighed. "Unfortunately, yes," he murmered.

Sakura groaned. She could practically _feel_ the migraines she would get when staying with these two. How they could manage to be on the same _campus_, let alone _dorm_, was beyond her.

"So, while we're on the topic of blowing things up, what are we going to do about our dorm?"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"You're kidding me, right?"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"I swear, one day I'm going to kill all of you in your sleep."


	3. Chapter 3

Konoha Academy

Ch. 3

"So. They let a perverted lech that writes porn be the principal of a school _why_, exactly?" Sakura asked, cocking an eyebrow in disbelief.

"Dunno," Shikamaru yawned, stretching slightly.

Sakura had met Shikamaru earlier, the genius with an IQ of over 200, but was to lazy to actually get off his ass and _use it_. So, even though Shika was on par, if not higher, than Sakura's own intelligence, he always lazy, always responding with, "It's too troublesome."

Sakura sighed. "Well, if I want a livable environment, might as well _try_." _And pray the pervert doesn't try to molest me, _she finished in her head, glancing up at the plaque on the office.

_Jiraiya, huh? _Sakura thought. _Isn't he Naruto's adoptive father? Guess that explains why he hasn't been expelled or held back yet,_ she pondered. _After all, given the fact that its already the beginning of October and school started in August, I wouldn't be surprised if Jiraiya needed to save Naruto's ass from detention already._

Taking a deep breath and a quick, "Good luck," from Shikamaru, Sakura pushed opened the door and tooka few cautious steps into the dimly lit office before gently shutting the door behind her.

She immediately regretted it.

Once her eyes adjusted to the low lighting of the roomSakura did a quick look-over on Naruto's adopted father andsoon-to-be principal.

He had a mass of long, whitish-silvery hair that was tied up in a low, loose ponytail. Two shoulder length bangs framed a kind, tanned face.A red streak ran from each of his eyes to his chin. Sakura couldn't really estimate his height, as he was sitting down, but he seemed rather tall.

"Ah! You must be the new student!" Jiraiya exclaimed, grabbing her deceptively small and delicate looking hands with both of his. "Good to see a new face!"

Sakura smiled brightly. She didn't miss the fact that Jiraiyas hands were rubbing small circles on the back of hers.

Sakura inwardly made a face and twitched. Definitely a pervert, she thought, recoiling her hands from the white haired males strong grip.

"Actually, I was here to see about my dorm room. It got blown up," she stated bluntly. "Oh! I need my uniform, too, once I think about it," Sakura added as an afterthought.

"Of course," Jiraiya sighed. "Was it Deidara again?"

Not even waiting for an answer, Jiraiya clapped his hands together and said, "Well, I'll get some guys to work on the dorm room problem, and meanwhile…"

Jiraiya whipped out a slip of paper and some folded clothes. "Your schedule and uniform!" he announced. "You can change in the back. There's a teacher's lounge, but it should be empty. Come meet me back here afterwards."

After a slight, quick bow, Sakura raced out the door, almost completely ignoring Shikamaru and intent on finding the teacher's lounge, eager to get this nightmare over with.

Five minutes later, Sakura stepped out of an empty teachers lounge in her new uniform.

She had a short, black pleated skirt that went just above halfway up her thighs and a pale gray linen blouse with sleeves that barely went past her shoulders. The weather was stillfairly warm due to the fact that it was just barely out of summer so her simple dark green sweater was slung across one shoulder.

Sakura hastily made her way back through deserted hallways back to Jiraiyas office and rushed past Shika, but, had she observed more closely, Sakura would have noticed that he had gotten a nosebleed once he realized what the pink haired teen was wearing.

" GAH!" Sakura screamed. "That stupid, lecherous, depraved, PERVERT!"

All the young men in the room, which consisted of Sasuke, Naruto, Sasori, Deidara, Itachi, and Tobi sweat dropped, slightly intimidated by the furious pink-haired demon ranting in their newly repaired dorm room, now in normal, casual clothes. Sakura hadn't let the boys see her new "uniform."

"Do you know what he did? He tried to freaking grope me! That stupid lech actually tried that with me!" Sakura ranted. Everyone huddled in their respective corners, cowering in fear.

"I'M BACK!" a voice bellowed. Everyone heard the distinctive click of the opening and shutting of the door, and, without missing a beat, Sakura wheeled around and punched whoever dared to disrupt her seethe.

There was a audible _CRACK_ as Sakura's fist connected with the unfortunate man's nose, and said man went flying.

Once she had realized what she had done, Sakura rushed over to the half conscious man, crying, "I am so sorry I didn't mean to!"

Upon closer observation, she realized the man's skin was an odd pale blue. (But then again, she was in no position to talk. She was the one with pink hair, after all.) He had gill-like tattoos on his cheekbones, and his teeth were sharp and pointy. His appearance was rather like a shark.

"Kisame?" Itachi asked, mild surprise etched onto his usually expressionless features.

The man dubbed "Kisame" let out a pained groan, gingerly rubbing his broken nose.

"Whover punched me has one hell of a right hook," he moaned, slowly getting back up. Now that he was on his two feet, Sakura noted, Kisame was a rather tall and imposing figure, at least six and a half feet tall, and with his shark like figure, he was rather intimidating.

"That would be her, yeah," Deidara announced, pointing a finger at Sakura.

"Seriously? That kitten?" Kisame asked, his eyebrows raised in disbelief. "That kitten did this?" he repeated, gesturing to his nose, which was now gushing a generous amount of blood.

Sakura sheepishly scratched the back of her neck.

"Hah, uh… I… guess?" Sakura said, the tone of her voice making the statement seem more like a question than an answer.

Surprisingly enough, Kisame grinned jovially, and, throwing a massive blue arm around her shoulders, announced, I like you kitten! You got spunk! Then he winced, remembering the fact that his nose was broken and it was not wise to yell with a fractured schnozz.

Seeing his pain, Sakura exclaimed, "Let me fix that!"

The others heard her outburst, and they looked at the pink haired female quizzically, curious to know how she intended to fix a broken nose, and one she inflicted, none the less.

Sakura racedto the kitchen, quickly locating the freezer and grabbed a handful of ice cubes. Then, finding a first aid kit underneath the sink, she collected a few rolls of medical gauze. Finally, she ran to one of the boy's room, not taking in enough details to figureout whose, and grabbed a wooden Ticonderoga pencil.

Sakura raced back to a confused Kisame and Co. and snapping the pencil in half, the aligned the halved writing utensil vertically along Kisame's nose. After warning him that it would definitely hurt, Sakura unwrapped some gauze and medical tape and taped the gauze horizontally across the bridge of the blue man's nose. Without a warning she snapped his nose into place, eliciting a sharp cry from the shark-like man.

"Here, hold these against your nose," Sakura instructed, handing Kisame some of the ice cubes.

"I don't think that's how you fix a nose," Kisame groaned.

"Don't worry, it works, trust me," Sakura reassured.

"So says the girl who broke my nose in the first place," Kisame retorted, grimacing in pain.

"Like I _said_, don't worry. I was taught by Tsunade. I dont think that she would appreciate you doubting your techniques," Sakura snapped.

Sakura grinned sadistically when she saw everyone in the room blanch in fear. (Minus Itachi of course. But even _his_ eyes widened slightly.)

"Tsu-Tsunade?" they all stuttered.

"L-like _the_ Tsunade, yeah? Senju Tsunade? As in the best doctor in Fire Country and the chick who was voted number one most bad ass kunoichi of the century, yeah?" Deidara asked, aghast.

"That explains her punch," Kisame muttered, gingerly rubbing his formerly-broken-then-painfully-fixed-nose.

No one notice that the entire time, ever since Kisame's arrival, that Tobi had been uncharacteristically quiet, never uttering "Tobi is a good boy!" once.

A quiet Tobi is never a good sign.

"What happened here?" a new, monotone voice sounded at the door.

Whirling around, Sakura's eyes widened in shock.

"Panda-chan!"


	4. Chapter 4

Konoha Academy

Ch. 4

"Panda-chan!" Sakura squeaked, rushing over to a certain red-head, giving said red-head a cheerful hug, apparently forgetting her "patient," who now looked very much dejected. (And in pain. His nose was hurting like a bitch. Oh well, Kisame. Man up and grow one.)

Everyone (except for Itachi, of course) flinched. Did a tiny, overly small, _pink haired GIRL_ call the freshman who got expelled before school even _started_, the guy who beat up two other freshmen for calling him the very name that she had practically yelled into his face?

No, this must be some mass hypnotism induced hallucination caused by some masked wearing, bipolar, evil genius ninja who used the moon to cast illusions and acted like Tobi. Hopefully.

Unfortunately, two blinks and a shake of a head proved it not to be so (if illusions could be removed like that), and Sakura really _was_ hugging a socially inept psycho with violent tendencies, and it appeared that she was oh, so, _very_ screwed.

Back to the situation at hand, the red-head mentioned so many times before was the one, the only, Sabaku no Gaara. With his messy, spiked up hair (much different than Sasori's; the explosive lover's friend had wine red, half curled bed head, while the aforementioned red-head had a more fiery, bright, crimson hair with actually _spikes_), a kanji tattoo on the side of his forehead, and his black rimmed, cold, pale aquamarine eyes, it was a wonder that Sakura didn't freeze up in fear the moment Gaara had entered the room; he practically radiated dangerous intent at all times.

No, instead, the petite pinkette was rambling on about something or the other, completely oblivious to the astounded and incredulous glares that surrounded her.

"How are Temari and Kankuro? Holy crow, I haven't seen you since you got adopted by the Kazekage guy, and that was, like, two _years_ ago! No contact from you, whatsoever, for _two whole years_! I didn't know your address, so I couldn't send you letters, but…" Sakura continued to chatter, while the whole time Gaara looked in with mostly impassive, but slightly confused eyes.

"Sakura…" the youngest "Sand Sibling," as that was what he and his two older siblings were called, began tentatively.

Sakura paused to take a breath of much needed oxygen. "Hm? Yes, Gaara?"

"This is and all boys school."

The green eyed girl twitched.

"Why the hell is it always about that! Shannaro!"

"Sakura-chan, wait! I'm sure Gaara missed you and it's just a misunderst- …! Wait! Sakura-chan! What are you doing? Think of the poor chai-"

_CRASH! BANG!_

"Oooww… Sakura-chan, wasn't that a bit of an over-kill? …! Not again! Sakura-chaaaaaan!"

_CRASH! CRACK!_

_ Pant… Pant…_

"That must have hurt, yeah."

"_You want some, too?!_"

"…No…yeah…"

After tending to an unconscious Naruto (who was placed in his room in the next door dorm, leaving a reluctant Sasuke to look after him), the current occupants of C4 (and Tobi) reclined on the recently replaced couches and chairs.

"So," Sakura yawned, worn out by the never-ending chaos. "School restarts tomorrow? Today _is _Sunday, right?"

Gaara nodded curtly. "You'll probably meet some familiar faces here," the tattooed red-head continued.

"Like who?" Sakura asked, curiosity peaked.

Gaara let out a rare smirk. "That is for us to know, and you to find out."

A good half hour later, Naruto was (unfortunately) awake and badgering everyone to go to Ichiraku's Ramen Stand and "fuel up."

This was answered with a collective "No way in hell!" and several glares. Wonder why.

Deciding that she could at least make a good impression (though it was kinda too late), Sakura volunteered to cook a lunch, seeing that it was already one o'clock a most.

"Do any of you guys want to help?" she asked. It _would_ be a challenge to cook for all these men by herself.

"Why should we, Pinky, when we've got a girl like you to do it?" Kisame asked, his sharp teeth bared in a joking grin.

"Sexist slave drivers," she muttered, before turning to Tobi asking, "What about you, Tobi? Do want to help?" Oddly enough, there was no response from the childish Uchiha.

"Oi! Tobi! Answer the lady you little shit, yeah!" Deidara yelled, earning a well deserved smack on the back of the head with a thick book that sent the blonde sprawling, courtesy of Sasori.

"Brat, watch your language," Sasori scolded, albeit monotonously. "There must be something wrong. Has Tobi ever _not _responded to something like this?" Sasori concluded his emotionless rant and eyed the Tobi, almost… Anxious.

"Itachi, when was the last time Tobi acted like this?" Sakura asked cautiously.

Said man narrowed his eyes in thought.

"That would be when Leader and Madara came," Itachi answered. At this, Deidara, Kisame, Sasori, and Tobi stiffened.

"Leader? _Madara_? Aniki, I don't give a crap about this 'Leader' guy, but _Madara_?" Sasuke gaped. "Why is _he_ coming _here_, of all places?" Apparently, Sasuke was not fond of this character. Hell, even Naruto seemed twitchier than usual.

"I don't want to seem like an incompetent, ignorant fool," Sakura began, (Sasuke snorts, Sakura says, "Shut up chicken ass hair." Naruto snickers. "She got you there teme!" "Hn. You're annoying, dobe." "Hey!") "But who's Madara?"

"Why, that would be our dear uncle. Currently, he is Tobi's guardian, and is halfway through college," Itachi answered smoothly. "For some reason, my dear, foolish otouto has a dislike for him."

"So who's this 'Leader' dude?" Sakura questioned, still puzzled.

"Me."

Sakura whipped around, only to be met face-to-chest (Damn her shortness!) with a intimidating figure.

She looked up to see said figure's face (face-to-chest, remember?), and was quite startled by what she saw.

"Me," as the man had dubbed himself, had fiery orange hair and odd, stormy grayish purple eyes, with concentric rings from the pupils out. Although his eyes and hair were interesting enough, it was his face itself that interested her,

He had many, _many_ piercings. There were three on either side of the bridge of his nose, two snake bites, three small hoops through his both ears, and a bar going diagonally through the cartilage of each. There were a few more that she couldn't place the name of (This little hook ones with the tiny bell-things dangling from it, what were those called?) but that's enough details.

Sakura decided to put on a brave front and do something _very, impossibly, STUPID_.

"Hi Me, nice to meet you me," she declared. "Odd name, though, isn't it?"

Sakura swore she heard a strangled groan coming from Deidara and Kisame, and, judging by the incredulous stares she could feel directed at her back (That's right, fools, Haruno Sakura can _feel _incredulous glares!), that was not a smart thing to say.

This time, she was _definitely _screwed.


	5. Chapter 5

Konoha Academy

Ch. 5

Poor, poor, Haruno Sakura. Blessed and cursed with brash courage.

Too bad she tends to use it at the wrong time.

After her bold declaration to the so called "Leader," it was like the world was slow-motion.

Most of the boys were openly gaping with ill-disguised horror, and the remaining few had eyes widened and eyebrows quirked.

Strange what a few sentences to the wrong person can do to _everyone_.

The new pierced man raised a single pierced eyebrow, obviously amused by the tiny scrap of a girl that joked around with him at the first meeting.

"Do you know who you are talking to, girl?" he questioned, his voice deep and hypnotizing, just like his eyes.

"Well, you called yourself 'Me,' apparently you're the Leader of these guys," Sakura paused to wave a hand flippant hand at the boys who were _still_ staring. "But other than that, nope. Am I supposed to?"

Suddenly, new voice (What's with all these people coming here?) laughed. Due to her smaller frame, and the fact that the man she was talking to was blocking her view of the doorframe, she couldn't see the figure that had just appeared. Unfortunately, she didn't need to see to know who the newcomer was.

"She got you good on that one, Pein," the man joked, finally moving into Sakura's vision. She wished he didn't.

Sasuke and Sakura sent scathing glares at the figure. Although Sakura had met the man once, she was _not_ eager to do so again, and she didn't even know the man's name!

"_You're_ Madara?" she spat, eyes narrowed.

"Miss me, love?" the elder Uchiha purred, strolling around the man now dubbed "Pein" to stand in front of the blossom-haired girl.

"If I knew your name was Uchiha Madara I would have gone to the cops to get a restraining license for you!" Sakura snarled, flinching away.

All the while, the three _other_ Uchiha's watched on, one amused, one incredulous, and the last completely oblivious and happy.

"Sakura…" Sasuke began slowly.

"_What_!?" Sasuke nearly flinching at being the newest victim of the cherry blossom's fury. Instead, he settled for a barely contained shudder.

Summoning up the last of his fleeting courage, Sasuke made one last attempt at finishing his sentence.

"How do you know my uncle?"

This stopped Sakura in her tracks. "Long story, and I'd rather not remember it," she growled. Madara merely chuckled.

"We have time, little kunoichi," Itachi said. Even _he _looked inquisitive. Hell, _everyone_ looked inquisitive, to very degrees. Stoic Pein mildly interested, like this was TV drama, but Naruto was gaping so badly it looked like he might start catching flies soon.

Sakura glared. Really? Little kunoichi? _That's_ the best nickname they could think of?

_It's better than 'Kitten' or 'Pinky_, she mused to herself.

Sakura glared harder. "If you _really_ want to know… Than no. I'm not in the mood for remembering unpleasant things, as you can see," the petite girl spat, viridian eyes flashing.

Itachi held up placating hands, as if surrendering. "There will be other times, I suppose, where you will be more… willing." The damn weasel had the nerve to smirk at her!

Casting a spiteful glance towards Madara, she said, "No lunch for you guys. I'm going to go crash in my room, wherever that is. How many floors does this damn dorm have, anyway?"

"Tobi will tell the pretty cherry blossom! Tobi knows! Pick Tobi! Please!" Tobi shouted, hopping up and down, looking for all the world like a kindergartener on speed.

"Fine, Tobi, you tell me," Sakura sighed.

Tobi fairly beamed with happiness. "Well, Tobi knows that there's floor number one, where the kitchen and TV room and eating place is," Tobi chirped. "Then Tobi knows that floor number two has three bathrooms and three bedrooms, and Tobi thinks that one is Deidara-senpai's, 'cause whenever Tobi tries to go into the last one, Deidara-senpai'll yell, 'Tobi you little shit, get out of my room, yeah!'" Sakura had to giggle at Tobi's pathetic imitation at the blonde artist, with the language, the little 'yeah' at the end of the sentence, and Tobi's childish voice, it was quite funny.

In the background, Naruto and Kisame suppressed snickers while Deidara fumed.

"Tobi thinks that the pretty cherry blossom's room is on the third floor, where Kisame-senpai, Neji-senpai, and Itachi-senp- …! Where the pretty cherry blossom go?"

Half a minute later, Sakura was in a random room on the third floor, snoozing away.

She should have checked _whose_ room it was, because it was _definitely_ not hers.

"Yo, 'Tachi, can you go tell the kitten that dinner's ready?" Kisame hollered from the kitchen, "preparing" some take-out to eat. (Basically putting everything on serving plates and dishing out bowls.)

Itachi glared at wall, irritated that someone should disturb his reading time in the living room, not that his foolish little brother and said brother's annoying loudmouth blonde friend hadn't done that already.

"Fine," he replied. "But I need to stop by my room, first." _To change into something more comfortable for home_, he added mentally.

"Whatever, just don't get punched in the face," his friend called back. "Oh, second thought, warn her that Madara and Leader planned a meeting for right after dinner, so Zetsu, Hidan, and Kakuzu'll be here, and Madara, Leader, your brother, Tobi, and the ramen-obsessed blonde brat'll be staying for dinner." Then he added, mostly to himself, "They have their _own_ dorms, so they should just get their own shitty take-out."

Itachi extracted himself from the recliner he had been resting on, and put down his book, careful to save the page he had been on.

In the next room, he could hear Sasuke and Naruto, then Sasori and Deidara arguing, mostly the former of each pair "hn"-ing and the latter of each yelling. Itachi massaged his temples to stave off the incoming migraine of he quietly climbed the stairs to get to his room.

Once the stoic young man reached his room, he pulled open the door, stepped inside, and shut it softly.

It was a nice room, the walls a deep, dark, almost navy blue and hardwood floors. Itachi's bed stood against a wall, the foot of the bed facing a moderately sized study table, which was littered with papers and books.

Itachi strode to the other side of his room, where his closet was located, nestled in a corner, not sparing anything a second glance or bothering to turn on his lights.

He _should_ have checked his room thoroughly and turned on his fluorescent ceiling lights, but he didn't, and that was going to bite him in the ass soon enough.

Itachi pulled off his shirt and draping it over the top of the drawer with one hand and pulling a shelve out with another, bending over to rifle through some clothing, when he heard a distinctive rustle come from the direction of his bed.

The raven-haired male stiffened, and slowly turned.

And there, on the bed, sitting and looking quite comfortable in the nest of black linen sheets on _his_ bed, rubbing the sleep from her eyes while _he_ stood, frozen and _shirtless_, was Haruno Sakura.

Had Itachi been anything less than a emotionless ice block, he would have been saying "Goddammit!" But, he was, so he just thought it.

_Damn._


	6. Chapter 6

Konoha Academy

Ch. 6

_Damn_, Itachi thought, staring at the slender figure snuggled on his bed. _What is she _doing _ here?_

"Uchiha-san?" Sakura mumbled, rubbing the sleep from dark jade eyes. "What're you doing here?" she asked, her drowsiness evident from the faint slur in her voice.

"… Changing," the older man replied stiffly. This seemed to bring the pink-haired girl out of her reverie.

"EH?!" Sakura gasped, jumping out of bed, eyes comically wide and her waist-length hair ruffled and messy. "D-Did you say _changing_? Shit, that means I'm in _your_ room! Kami-sama, sorry, sorry, _sorry_!" she panicked, and vanished out the door in a flurry of cherry-blossomed colored hair, leaving a stunned Itachi in her wake.

_Odd_, Itachi pondered vaguely. _Usually girls would be more concentrated on the fact that I'm changing in front of them, not that they accidentally slept in my room…_

Once everyone, including a fully clothed Itachi, was situated at the dining room table, Deidara _attempted_ to create some idle chatter.

"_So_, Haruno-san, where's all your stuff, yeah? I thought you were living here, so you might've brought some of your things over, un," the blonde artist started.

Sighing, Sakura replied, "Orphan, remember? I don't even have _clothes_ with me, so I'm lucky I've got the uniform that Jiraiya-san gave me. And there's really no need to call me 'Haruno-san,' it makes me feel old. Just 'Sakura' is fine." When she looked up from the piece of salt and pepper chicken that she was stabbing with her fork, she was met with incredulous stares.

Averting her eyes back to the unfortunate piece of chicken that was now under-going death-by-getting-poked-full-of-holes-via-fork, she muttered, "What?"

"Eh, Sakura-chan, there's not _supposed_ to be a uniform for this school," Naruto said.

Sakura twitched. "Th-that means that pervert of a principal- He- I'M GOING TO KILL HIM!" she yelled, standing up abruptly, causing some of the males to flinch at the emerald-eyed girl's sudden rage.

Kisame cleared his throat loudly. "Well, since kitten here apparently harbors some great grudge against her school uniform, and her current clothes are pretty dirty, what's she going to wear tomorrow?"

This comment earned Sakura everyone's full attention, Gaara, Sasori, and Itachi's blank stares proving to be the most unnerving.

"Um, I guess I could just wear some of your guys' clothes. It's not like I got something against guy clothes; I used to wear Naruto, Sasuke, and Gaara's all the time back at the orphanage," Sakura supplied. Apparently, this was not the wisest thing to say, as said males earned the cold stares that had previously been on her.

"Yeah… So… Any volunteers on who wants to lend me their old shirts, shorts…" Sakura trailed off, slowly lowering herself back onto her seat. Great. All the attention is back on her.

"You can borrow one of my older shirts, Pinky. We have a sewing kit laying around somewhere, so you can sew it up like a dress," Kisame offered, all smirks and sharp teeth.

_Sure, that could work_, Sakura thought, idly chewing on the piece of chicken that she had tortured for the past five minutes.

Right then, the door burst open and three figure stormed past the living room into the kitchen.

"Where the hell is my fucking dinner, seriously?"

_Twitch._

"Oi, Hidan, that's not a very smart thing to say right now, yeah."

"I'll say whatever the fuck I want! Who's going to fucking stop me, seriously?"

"Hidan, please **shut the hell up before I eat you**."

"…two-thousand five-hundred forty two ryo, two-thousand five-hundred forty three ryo, two-thousand five-hundred forty four ryo…"

_Twitch._

"Hey, who's the fucking pink bitch? Oi, pink bitch, what the fuck are you doing here?!"

_Pink bitch? Oh, no, he just crossed the line!_

"SHANNARO!" _CRASH!_

"Hey… Itachi…" Kisame began tentatively. "You _did_ remember to tell kitten that these three are coming over, right?"

"… Hn." Translation- _Must have slipped my mind between me changing and finding her asleep in _my _room while I was doing it. _Of course, Kisame doesn't understand Itachi-nese, so to speak.

A few minutes later, once Sakura had "relieved some anger," she had been introduced to the three newcomers; Hidan the cussaholic Jashinist, Kakuzu, and I quote from Hidan, 'the fucking money grubbing creeper,' and Zetsu, the dichromatic schizophrenic. After the intros, Sakura learned a bit more about her dorm mates and neighbors over the remaining dinner time, even going as far as to jot down a list that included appearances, personality, likes, dislikes, and favorite foods. After some urging from Tobi, she had reluctantly titled it "Sakura's Besties Forever List."

What was troublesome was that while she was writing, there was always someone breathing down her neck- usually the person she was writing about- and correcting/asking her to change something about their personalities and/or looks.

These people would promptly get a fist in the face.

After she finished dinner, she stole away after quickly and discussing which of Kisame's shirts she would fix up with said shark man.

While the most of others were bickering loudly over who would get the last piece of tilapia ("It's mine, yeah!" "Shut the fuck up you fucking pansy! That fucking fish is mine!" "Please stop shouting **you assholes**." "Hey, that fish is mine! Big man's got to eat!" _Le gasp._ "You would eat your own fishy kind, yeah? Thy fishy brethren?" "Shut up, Barbie."), Sakura retreated to the third floor and located Kisame's room, which was at the end of the hall, and, not really paying any attention, grabbed a shirt that was hanging from a desk chair before heading over to a one of the three other vacant rooms.

The first thing she noticed that the room. Was. Utterly. **Boring**. The walls were a dull gray, and the ceiling was and off white. The floor was covered with a carpet that might have once been white, but neglect and lack of use turned it brownish-gray. A simple cot, not even a bed, but a _cot_, was tucked into a corner while another held a simple desk, desk lamp, and chair. A small window was placed directly above the desk.

_Hm, if I'm moving in here, I'll going to have to do some _serious_ remodeling_, Sakura thought absently as she rifled though the desk drawer. The pinkette made a small sound of success as she found a small sewing kit hidden away, just like Kisame had said earlier.

Smiling and humming softly, Sakura settled herself down and started to work.

Sakura yawned as early morning sunlight filtered through the dirty and cracked panes of the window. She winced as she straightened, and her back ached in protest to her stretching. Frowning in discomfort, she turned her head to the unforgiving wood of her desk and the finished replacement clothes that stared innocently back.

_Must have fallen asleep on the desk after I finished working_, the irritable girl thought wearily. _At least its done…_

Quickly stripping out of her old jeans and t-shirt that she had been wearing since her escape from the orphanage, she put on Kisame's old t-shirt, pleased to find that it fit like a charm.

Since Kisame was so much taller than her, Sakura had decided to turn the shirt into a dress. The dress reached just above her knees and the sleeves barely touched her elbow. The whole thing was black, with a white and cerulean outline of a shark. The tail curled around her hips, and the head rested on her ribcage.

_Pretty good for a night's work_, she innerly praised herself.

Running a hand through messy pink locks, she skipped downstairs in her new attire and practically ran to the kitchen. The remnants of last night's dinner still lay around the dinner table, but she noticed that there were a few less plates than people who ate.

"At least some people take care to put their things away," she muttered, wandering to the fridge and opening its door to find it filled to exploding with various foods.

Sakura stared at it was horror written all over her face. They _still_ ordered take-out when they had all this to eat?

Sighing and shaking her head in disappointment, she cracked her knuckles and faced her first true challenge of living in Konoha Academy.

…Making breakfast.


	7. Chapter 7

Konoha Academy

Ch. 7

Breakfast. The largest and most important meal of the day, and is said to help raise early morning spirits. Many people have made breakfast for themselves, spouses, siblings, and friends.

Sakura was attempting to make breakfast to feed young men. Lotso, growing, hungry, young men.

You try doing. Bet you can't, huh? I thought not.

Anyway, let's wrap up out little flashback and get on with it. But we won't be starting with Sakura's point of view, oh no.

Pein woke up to the smell of food. Very, _very_ good smelling food, especially if you've been living off take out for the past month because you can't cook for shit and your pathetically annoying college dorm mate can't either. (*coughMadaracough*)

The orange-haired young man slowly rose from his position on the living room couch and winced when his stiff muscles voice their protest in the form of a sharp ache, then nearly tripped over a snoring Madara, who was splayed dangerously by the couch on the floor.

Sending a disdainful scowl to the spiky-haired Uchiha, Pein picked his way through discarded take-out boxes, chopsticks, and paper plates. (There were more… disturbing objects lying around, like puddles of unknown half liquids, half solids…)

After completing the obstacle coarse known as the living room, he bee-lined to the kitchen and the first thing he noticed was the figure with cherry blossom pink hair practically dancing as she cooked, humming softly as she spun in gentle circles while tending to several frying pans' worth of food.

Pein must stood there for at least three minutes, before, half-way through a loose pirouette, she noticed him leaning against the doorframe.

Sakura paused in mid-twirl, mouth half open for another thirty seconds before Pein cocked an eyebrow and tilted his towards the stove, where several strips of bacon were smoking suspiciously.

The rosette gasped and finished her turn, hurriedly flipping the slices and adjusting the heat under a few other pans.

Pein watched on with amusement as the pinkette seemingly forgot about her company and busied herself with cooking, smirking slightly at the slightly clueless girl.

Still smirking, the orange-headed man turned and tromped lightly up the stairs, intent on doing Sakura a small favor and wake up the others. Raising a hand to knock on Itachi's door, but stopped when the door suddenly swung inward, revealing a slightly bleary-eyed Uchiha.

"Wake the others," Pein said, and, without waiting for an answer, turned and strolled to the second floor. Itachi merely sighed and went to wake Kisame.

The fiery-headed pierced man knocked on Sasori's door, raising an eyebrow when a shirtless red-head appeared at the doorway, lazily rubbing the sleep from his eyes, his bed-head even messier than usual.

He repeated the order that he gave Itachi, rolling ringed eyes when Sasori grumbled under his breath and slammed the door, presumably to change his (lack of) clothes.

Pein sighed, heading back downstairs, sending a kick to a drooling Madara that jerked the college sophomore awake, then continued to the kitchen. (Ignoring the eldest Uchiha's protests, of coarse.) Making his steps deliberately louder than usual to warn Sakura of his approach so he wouldn't startle her, he came up behind the pinkette.

"The others will come shortly," he said. Sakura hummed softly to show that she heard, pulling on some mitts and bending down to the oven (_Since when did they have an oven?_ Pein mused) to pull out a tray of what appeared to by monkey bread.

Had Pein not been as composed as he was, he would have been drooling from the delicious aroma coming from the warm buns.

_Slam!_

"I'm fucking hungry, seriously!"

"Again, Hidan, shut up before I eat you."

"…two-thousand five-hundred forty five ryo, two-thousand five-hundred forty six ryo, two-thousand five-hundred forty seven ryo…"

"TOBI IS A GOOD BOY! YAY~!"

A tick developed on both foreheads. _Again?_

After asking Pein to make sure that nothing burned (which was pretty much useless since Pein wouldn't know what to do if something actually burned anyway), she engaged in an activity she was starting to enjoy _too_ much- causing Hidan pain, and I quote, "Not the fucking good kind."

After about ten minutes of beating the shit out of Hidan, much to the amusement of Kakuzu and her dorm mates, who had long since wandered downstairs, Sakura dusted off her hands and motioned towards the silver-haired Jashinist, half-lying over a dark leather couch by the bookshelf.

Deidara, his hair in peak condition, half ponytail, bangs, and all, snickered rather loudly, as did Kisame and Zetsu. Sasori, Kakuzu, Gaara, and Itachi merely half-smirked. Tobi was… well… Tobi.

After a _long_ while, when everyone was situated at the dining table (including an exuberant Naruto and brooding Sasuke, thanks to Naruto's "excellent sense if smell") Sakura noticed something… _odd_.

"Didn't you guys say that Neji was in this dorm, too? I haven't seen him yet," Sakura questioned, fork poised a couple inches from her mouth.

Most of the boys were already digging in, some with gusto and relish, some almost savagely tearing at their food, others eating pretty much like normal human beings.

"Who? You mean the fucking white-eyed gay fucker?" Hidan asked with a mouthful of scrambled eggs.

"Dumb ass," Kakuzu muttered under his breath, lazily flicking a glob of home-made icing from the chunk of monkey bread on his plate.

"Hyuga-san is visiting his family. He'll come to school directly from there," Itachi said quietly, cutting of a slice of sausage.

"Neji-senpai scares Tobi," Tobi whimpered. "He glares at Tobi a lot. Scary eyes…"

Tobi sniffled pitifully, then proceeded to attack his stack of pancakes, Deidara scoffing disdainfully and glaring at the Uchiha with disgust, all three Uchiha's, actually, before doing the exact same of Tobi.

_Hypocrite_, Sakura thought, before doling out a small portion of bacon and eggs for herself.

Everyone, satisfied and full of delicious, non-take-out food (for once) migrated to the living room and lazed around happily, as there was still another forty-five minutes before school start at eight thirty. Hidan had left the group earlier, panicking about is hair, which, even though it looked absolutely _fine_, needed to be combed thoroughly and hair gelled. Again. Weren't _girls_ supposed to be the hair obsessors?

"So, kitten," Kisame began, lounging on the sofa, "looks like you've made the dress alright."

_Comments are rather late, aren't they?_ Sakura mused, a slender pink eyebrow lifted.

"Came out fine," she replied airily, spinning around a few times to show off her work, skirt fluttering to her thighs.

"You look absolutely adorable, love!" Madara crowed. "Of course, wouldn't you look better in _my_ clothes, _with nothing underneath_?"

"_Pedophile,_"Deidara gagged behind the Uchiha's back, and Itachi, bless Kami for sane people, threw a rather large encyclopedia at the back of Madera's head, knocking the eldest male. Madara sank to the floor, face buried into a cushion.

"Won't he suffocate?" Sakura asked, eyebrow raised again.

A majority of the room's population scowled. "If only," they chorused.

Hidan chose this time to burst into the room.

"Fuck!" the silver-haired man panted. "Th- there's some fucking insane chick outside… She- she wants to see the pink bitch," he wheezed. "Said her name was Tsunade."

_Shit_.


End file.
